“Hello world” will take twenty minutes to run because the underlying virtual machine, interpreter and OS is so slow. To speed this up, Amazon will offer “hello world” as a service.
One bitcoin will cost $0.00002. Also, you can now get high-end 3D video cards on Ebay for super cheap.
Someone will demonstrate an English-to-code interpreter and get $10M of seed funding, by pretending that the code didn’t already exist in 2010.
You will still need to wipe and reinstall Windows every year or two.
Linus Torvalds will murder the CEO of nVidia, and the news media will claim it is a bold and forward-thinking move.
Another bug in OpenSSL is exploited to rebroadcast nude selfies on US bank sites. Bank site visits will go up 137% and the bug will be reclassified as a feature.
Only eleven people will be left in the world who know how to program in assembly language. Microsoft will put out a press release announcing that all the assembly code that could possibly exist, already exists.
There will be 342,948 match-three type games released for Android and iOS. Only one of those games will break the Top 10: “Kittens”. The CEO of the company will say “People like kittens, and they definitely like matching three of them at a time.”
Scratch will be the only programming language required for a computer science degree. Text-based programming languages will be deprecated because they are “ugly to look at.” People studying computer science in college will be able to graduate without knowing how to read.
There are 500 billion IoT (Internet of Things) devices connected to the internet. Unfortunately, the firmware for all these devices was last updated in 2018, so as a result, around 93.4% of them are mining bitcoin for the North Korean government. This was one of the key factors causing the Bitcoin crash of 2021 (see above). A reissue of the original 1970’s design of Mr Coffee becomes a hot holiday item, with a large gold sticker proclaiming “NO INTERNET!”
On the lighter side: a dozen MIT students will develop an OSI layer 1 protocol called “IP Over Voice.” IP Over Voice permits you to route IP packets by listening and yelling the phonetic alphabet at other people. The students are able to open a TCP connection across the Harvard Bridge, but they give up trying to establish an HTTP connection because “it just got too cold out there.”
In the year 2022, everyone will be able to create cross-platform bugs and security holes faster than ever before.